On the list of things that women can't do that men don't think about? Jumpstarting a stranger's car.
Last night, like many of you, I was once again struck by the amazing sunset. I had left the house that morning with an armload of parcels in preparation of an upcoming work ceremony so left without my "good" camera so, naturally, this is the evening I have a few moments at the exact time of a stellar sunset. As they say, "the best camera for the job is the one you have", so I decided it was best to catch it with my iPhone than not catch it at all. I pulled into the parking lot at the end of Truesdale at dusk, locked my car and walked to the water's edge to take a few shots of the pinks and oranges overtaking the sky.
Truthfully, I seldom walk to the end of the Del Norte pier with my camera anymore, recognizing the detriment to my safety. I try and be aware and not put myself into those situations that endanger me. Before getting out of the car in this small lot, I did look around, checking my surroundings for what can sometimes be a sketchy crowd. Except for a woman sitting in her little beater car reading, it looked safe but, as I left my car, she called out to me through her window and asked if I had jumper cables. "No, sorry" as I walked away immediately feeling pangs of guilt - I have cables. As I captured the beautiful darkening sky, my mind reminded me that she was a woman alone though I'm confident this was not the first evening she had sat in a darkened parking lot alone, if you catch my drift. She can handle herself. Then my mind, again, reminded me I have three daughters, any one of which might find themselves alone in a parking lot with a dead battery having sat too long with the radio or lights on. Sigh...if I don't help her, she'll have to ask other people, putting herself in potential danger.
I walked back to my car, checked the hatch to confirm I had the cables and asked her if she knew how to use them because, frankly, I always forget. She did so I pulled my car nose-to-nose with hers and popped the hood. As I got out of the car and handed her the cables, I realized I was in a dimly-lit parking lot, often frequented by a pretty unsavory collection of people, leaving my keys in the ignition with the car running. What am I doing?! As she popped the black and red cables on to her car's battery posts then mine, I looked around nervously. She got in her car and it started right up. We "whoop"ed for a second (maybe that was just me), she disconnected the cables, and handed them back with a brief thank you. I backed up, she drove off and sat for a second, breathing a sigh of relief. Doors locked.
She was not effusive in her thanks - not ungrateful but I gather from her adept use of the cables that this was not her first run at this rodeo. She does this all the time. I do not. I didn't realize how unaccustomed I was to this until I got to my meeting and realized I was shaking. Maybe not shaky but unnerved. As I joined the few early women at the meeting, I shared my experience and shocked myself by breaking into a brief ugly cry, recognizing how I had potentially put myself into a situation where I could have been car-jacked in a heartbeat. (Thank you MaryEllen for the needed hug to sooth my embarrassment). This "damsel in distress" could easily have had a partner waiting in the dark corner of the lot and, while I was being a good Samaritan, they might have joyfully conked me over the head and taken my car, purse...EVERYTHING. The cops that would take the report, whom I probably know, would shake their head as they took their report and put my distinctively striped Subaru on the BOL list . My husband would say, "you did WHAT?!".
And the internet? The trolls would remind me I should NEVER leave my car running with the keys in it. I should NEVER put myself in that position. The anonymous trolls know EVERYTHING. But, to my original point, would the same situation even warrant a mention by a man? How many times has my husband jump-started a stranger's car without telling even one person. Without coming home and saying, "ya know what I did today?". And, when he did it, would I or anyone have questioned his carelessness in doing so?
Well, here's one thing the trolls DON'T know: the trolls don't know that sometimes the Karma Fairy exists. The trolls don't know that "kindness is never wasted". But I really need to take a self-defense class.
